Transactional analysis: gender fluidity and gender identity

 Here is a brief Transactional Analysis (TA) lens that can be used to think about subjective mental states, gender fluidity, and biological sex.

• Subjective mental states

  • These are first-person experiences like thoughts, feelings, urges, images, body sensations, and a sense of self; they are private, context-sensitive, and influenced by learning, culture, language, and expectations [1]. They can shift rapidly (from moment-to-moment “states”) or exhibit longer patterns (“traits”), and we infer them through self-reports, behavior, and physiological proxies rather than direct observation [3].

• Gender fluidity

  • A gender identity that can shift over time or across contexts, rather than remaining fixed as solely male or female. It is distinct from sexual orientation and from biological sex. People who are gender-fluid may vary their expression, pronouns, or roles, and may or may not experience dysphoria; supportive, nonjudgmental environments typically help well-being [4]. Cultures and subcultures differ in language and norms around gender, so lived experience and social context matter [6].

• Biological sex

  • Refers to biological attributes such as chromosomes, gonads, hormones, internal and external reproductive anatomy, and secondary sex characteristics. While most people are categorized as female (often XX) or male (often XY), there is natural variation (for example, chromosomal, hormonal, or developmental differences) that can lead to intersex traits; biology is complex even when legal or social systems simplify it [2]. Clinical contexts often reference primary sex characteristics (reproductive structures) and secondary sex characteristics (pubertal changes), acknowledging variability across individuals [5].

How they relate

• Gender identity (including gender fluidity) is a subjective sense of oneself that interacts with, but is not the same as, biological sex; many people experience alignment, others do not. The subjective mental states you notice (e.g., feelings, imagery, self-talk) are the “phenomenological” side of gender identity and expression, while biological sex is the bodily/biological side; both are shaped by development and context [6].

A brief Transactional Analysis perspective

• TA views inner life through ego states—Parent, Adult, and Child—as patterns of feeling, thinking, and behaving. Subjective states (e.g., “who I feel I am right now”) can reflect different ego states coming to the foreground. Scripts (lifelong patterns or life-plans) can include cultural messages (injunctions, permissions) about gender and the self; these messages are learned early and can show up as internal voices, “OK/Not-OK” positions, and recurrent feelings (“rackets”). TA encourages noticing script signals (posture, gestures, words, clothing, roles) and strengthening the Adult ego state to appraise here-and-now reality and choose congruent expression [1][3].

Sources

1 Transactional Analysis Counseling in Action (Counseling in Action series) Fourth Edition by Ian Stewart (Author)

2 Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy: A Systematic Individual and Social Psychiatry Hardcover – September 10, 2021 by Eric Berne (Author)

3 The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They Do, Revised and Updated Paperback – February 24, 2009 by Judith Rich Harris (Author)

4 Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis. Paperback – August 27, 1996 by Eric Berne (Author)

5 Genogram with Transactional Analysis in Coaching: A Road Map for Counseling & Coaching - An intuitive visual approach to unlock your clients' self-awareness to achieve personal & professional growth Paperback – December 16, 2023 by Claudia Musicco (Author

6 Beyond Games and Scripts Hardcover – January 1, 1976 by Eric Berne (Author)

In addition:

Here’s an integrated view that connects:

• Berne’s Parent–Adult–Child (PAC),
• Freud’s superego–ego–id,
• Harris’s peer-group influence and OK-positions,
• and Ayn Rand’s intrinsicism, objectivism, and subjectivism/emotionalism,
  and then applies this lens to subjective mental states, gender fluidity, and biological sex.

1. Mapping the models together

• Berne’s PAC and Freud’s structural model

  • Parent ≈ internalized rules, ideals, and prohibitions; functionally overlaps with the Superego (internalized “shoulds,” approvals, taboos) [1][2].
  • Adult ≈ here-and-now data processing, testing reality, weighing evidence; functionally overlaps with the Ego (mediates between drives, ideals, and reality) [1][2].
  • Child ≈ spontaneous feelings, needs, impulses, creativity; functionally overlaps with the Id (wishes, primary process) and also includes the Adapted Child (conditioned responses) [1][2].
  • In TA terms: structural analysis identifies which ego state is active; functional analysis tracks how those states transact with others; script analysis explores how early messages shape life patterns and payoffs [1].

• Harris’s contribution (I’m OK—You’re OK; peer group as social context)

  • The peer group reinforces “OK/Not-OK” life positions and provides strokes (attention/recognition) that stabilize or challenge one’s script; peer norms can operate like an external Parent or as a reality-checking Adult, depending on the group’s culture [3].
  • Peer membership can amplify rackets (recycled feelings), drama triangle roles (Persecutor–Victim–Rescuer), or permission for growth, shifting which ego state becomes dominant in social settings [3].

• Working synthesis in practice

  • Superego/Parent supplies rules and ideals; Id/Child supplies energy and desire; Ego/Adult evaluates reality and chooses; peer groups add social “currencies” and permissions/injunctions that can either align the system or pull it off-balance [4].

2. Integrating Ayn Rand’s intrinsicism, objectivism, and subjectivism/emotionalism

• As cognitive–valuational stances that can “color” each ego state:
  • Intrinsicism: treats values as inherent in things or decreed by authority—can manifest as a rigid Parent/Superego that assumes moral truths are given and not to be questioned; risk is dogmatism that bypasses Adult inquiry [5].
  • Subjectivism/emotionalism: treats values as merely personal feelings—can manifest as Child/Id dominance where impulses or moods drive choices; risk is volatility and neglect of longer-range consequences or shared facts [5].
  • Objectivism: aims for values grounded in facts and chosen purposes—aligns with Adult/Ego functions that integrate evidence, long-term goals, and principled decision-making; risk is underdeveloped empathy if misapplied as “cold rationalism,” which can weaken healthy Child spontaneity and affiliative Parent warmth [5].
• Balanced integration
  • A resilient personality uses Adult/Ego to arbitrate between Parent/Superego rules and Child/Id needs, while testing beliefs (intrinsicist or subjectivist) against objective evidence and chosen life goals; peer groups are leveraged for reality checks, support, and constructive feedback rather than conformity or emotional contagion [4][5].

3. Application to subjective mental states, gender fluidity, and biological sex

• Subjective mental states

  • Think of “what I feel/think now” as which ego state is foreground: Parent (voices of precepts), Adult (observing, naming, testing), Child (felt-sense, impulses, imagination); the Adult’s job is to reality-test and integrate, not to suppress vitality or compassion [1][4].
  • Intrinsicist coloring: “Because authority/culture says so, it must be true about me.” Subjectivist coloring: “Because I feel it now, it defines me wholly.” Objectivist stance: “What do the data of my experience show over time, and which choices align with my long-range values?” [5].

• Gender fluidity

  • Gender identity is a subjective sense of self that may shift across time and contexts; TA asks: which early injunctions (“Don’t be you,” “Don’t feel,” “Don’t belong”) or permissions shaped your internal map of gendered self-expression, and how does your peer environment reinforce or ease those patterns? [1][3][6].
  • Parent/Superego pressures can carry cultural dogmas; Child/Id contributes authentic felt identity and expression; Adult/Ego evaluates safety, congruence, and practical choices in context; peer groups can either provide permission and accurate mirroring or apply shaming and rackets—shifting life positions between I’m OK/You’re OK vs. I’m Not-OK/You’re OK [2][3][6].
  • Intrinsicism tends to fix gender meanings as “given”; subjectivism can over-index on momentary affect; an objectivist posture invites careful observation of patterns across time, informed consent about any changes, and respectful alignment with one’s goals and well-being [5][6].

• Biological sex

  • Biological sex involves chromosomes, gonads, hormones, and anatomy; it’s a biological construct with typical patterns and natural variation; Adult/Ego recognizes biological facts without letting Parent/Superego dogma or Child/Id fear/idealization distort understanding or compassion [2][6].
  • Peer norms often collapse sex, gender identity, and expression; the Adult differentiates them, reducing unnecessary inner conflict and enabling clearer communication and choices [3][4].

4. How this guides personal reflection (not a treatment plan)

• Spot scripts and permissions/injunctions
  • What “Parent lines” do you hear about gender, identity, and belonging? Which peer-group rules reward or punish variance? Which permissions help you act congruently? [1][3].
• Strengthen Adult/Ego reality-testing
  • Track patterns of experience across contexts and time; distinguish momentary affect from enduring preferences; gather supportive data and feedback while protecting privacy and safety [2][4].
• Balance values stances
  • Watch for intrinsicist rigidity or subjectivist impulsivity; aim for an objectivist process: evidence, integration with long-range aims, and benevolence toward self and others [5].
• Calibrate peer influence
• Seek groups that offer accurate mirroring, informed discourse, and OK–OK relating; minimize environments that run drama triangles or trade in shaming strokes [3][4].

Sources

1 Transactional Analysis Counseling in Action (Counseling in Action series) Fourth Edition by Ian Stewart (Author)

2 Genogram with Transactional Analysis in Coaching: A Road Map for Counseling & Coaching - An intuitive visual approach to unlock your clients' self-awareness to achieve personal & professional growth Paperback – December 16, 2023 by Claudia Musicco (Author

3 Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis. Paperback – August 27, 1996 by Eric Berne (Author)

4 Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy: A Systematic Individual and Social Psychiatry Hardcover – September 10, 2021 by Eric Berne (Author)

5 Born To Win: Transactional Analysis With Gestalt Experiments Paperback – Illustrated, August 30, 1996 by Muriel James (Author), Dorothy Jongeward (Author)

6 The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They Do, Revised and Updated Paperback – February 24, 2009 by Judith Rich Harris (Author)

Finally: 

             Gender-affirming surgeries

In general, gender-affirming surgeries are not recommended for prepubertal children, and for adolescents, they are typically deferred until legal adulthood, with any rare exceptions requiring careful, multidisciplinary evaluation, strong informed consent safeguards, and compliance with local laws and standards of care [2][4][5][6].

Why this is the prevailing approach:

• Irreversibility and developmental considerations: Surgery involves permanent changes; clinicians prioritize the child’s ongoing physical, cognitive, and psychosocial development, and the need for a stable pattern of gender identity over time before irreversible steps are considered [1][3][5].
• Informed consent and capacity: Assessing a minor’s capacity to understand risks, benefits, and alternatives is complex; robust, staged consent processes with guardian involvement are standard when considering any significant intervention [2][4].
• Stepwise, least-invasive-first care: Best practice emphasizes individualized, incremental care (psychosocial support, social transition, and other reversible or partially reversible options) before any irreversible procedures are contemplated [2][5].
• Multidisciplinary oversight and legal context: Care is typically coordinated by teams (medical, mental health, family) and must follow jurisdictional regulations and professional guidelines; practice patterns vary by region and evolve with evidence [4][6].

What is usually prioritized instead for minors

• Supportive, nonjudgmental psychosocial care for the young person and family (education, coping skills, addressing stigma, and any co-occurring mental health concerns) [1][3][5].
• Time and careful monitoring to understand the persistence, intensity, and context of gender dysphoria across settings, with attention to safety and well-being at school, home, and in peer environments [2][6].

A brief Transactional Analysis (TA) lens

• Strengthen the Adult ego state: slow, reality-tested decision processes that weigh evidence and long-term aims, rather than rushing under distress or pressure [1][4].
• Check Parent messages and peer-group pressures: notice cultural injunctions (“should/shouldn’t”) and social rewards/punishments that might push premature decisions; seek OK–OK relating and accurate mirroring instead of shaming or drama triangles [3][4].
• Validate the Child’s feelings: acknowledge the young person’s lived experience and distress while protecting future options until there is sufficient stability and capacity for informed choice [1][3].

Sources

1 Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy: A Systematic Individual and Social Psychiatry Hardcover – September 10, 2021 by Eric Berne (Author)

2 The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They Do, Revised and Updated Paperback – February 24, 2009 by Judith Rich Harris (Author)

3 Genogram with Transactional Analysis in Coaching: A Road Map for Counseling & Coaching - An intuitive visual approach to unlock your clients' self-awareness to achieve personal & professional growth Paperback – December 16, 2023 by Claudia Musicco (Author

4 Transactional Analysis Counseling in Action (Counseling in Action series) Fourth Edition by Ian Stewart (Author)

5 Born To Win: Transactional Analysis With Gestalt Experiments Paperback – Illustrated, August 30, 1996 by Muriel James (Author), Dorothy Jongeward (Author)

6 Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis. Paperback – August 27, 1996 by Eric Berne (Author)